Things I can spend $1200 on if I could actually get it: 

• 200 Chicken & Cheese Pub Quesadillas 
• Elkay LZS8WSLK EZH2O Bottle Filling Station with Single ADA Cooler, Filtered, 8 GPH, Light Gray
• Zoom Pro for 80 Whole Months 
• A Lawn Roomba 
• 1,111 Coffee Refills at Brewer Bookstore (#caribouforlife)
• 40 Titus Tickets (too soon?) 
• 138 Fat Bags 
• A Ton of Bagels…This isn’t hyperbole, I think I could probably get a ton of bagels. 
• Idk like one fifty-seventh of my tuition 
• Like 3 Gucci Belts, Dude. 
• Lots of Spicy Water 
• FORTY YEARS OF GOLF MAGAZINE 
• My Study Abroad Down Payment Without Worry (too real?)
• Probs Some Twitter Clout 
• More Tattoos (I Am Severely Needing a Coverup) 
• Dirt Bike @agehl 
• 1/267^th of a house (based on the average cost of a house in NYS…yikes) 
• 800 Pub Cookies 
• My Books For Future Semesters (Ugh, also too real)
• Half the Vera Bradley Wall @ Brewer Bookstore
• A Nintendo Switch AND Animal Crossing 
• Tickets to That Tiger Place IDK I Haven’t Watched Tiger King Yet 
• A Donation Bernie (I KNOW that man would’ve given me my $1200) 
• So Many Tapestries It Would Be a Guaranteed Fire Hazard
• More The Hill News Staff Hoodies (xoxo) 
• Therapy, Bro (normalize it folks) 
• Cardboard Cut Out of The Ice Age Baby So I Could Punch It (@Niamh, @Cole, @Maddie) 
• Get Snoop Dogg To Tell Me He’s Proud of Me (No, really)
• An Entire Movie Theater For Myself (Once they reopen! #flattenthecurve) So That I Don’t Feel Bad Crying at A24 Films
• Some Cool Earrings…My Dream 

Anyways, I can’t get any of that because I’m not deemed worthy of receiving the $1,200, despite being a taxpayer who lost her job. What would you buy? Comment please; I want to know and laugh in these weird times.