Established in 1911 at St. Lawrence University
Established in 1911 at St. Lawrence University

The Mesa: Thermostat Turmoil

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After seeing his father struggle with the thermostat all last week, Jesus Christ (also known as “The Lamb of God”), finally stepped in and helped him out.  Talking to “The Mesa,” Jesus remarked, “He hasn’t been able to program the temperature since we installed a new system in the 1980’s.  He always sets it too high now.”

A visibly frustrated God replied that, “It isn’t my fault.  Since we transitioned to a cloud based system I can never find the saved settings.”  Meanwhile, his son looked meaningfully towards the shredded user manual in the trash.

“At least it only affected areas where people don’t really care,” Jesus said in a positive manner. If we change the Florida temperature 30 degrees in one day we have issues, upstate New York, no big deal.” The Savior then went on to describe how, on the third day of creation when his father was creating the region, God was bored and randomized the weather settings.  “I would change it, but consistent weather might just freak people out,” Jesus concluded.

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