Let’s talk about an evening at Java. The band is going crazy inside, it’s crowded, it’s sweaty, it’s loud, it’s wild; one might say it’s wet and hot. The bathroom is crowded too, so you go pee behind the venue with your friends on the lookout. 

It is during this endeavor that you lose your prime spot up at the barriers. You maneuver your way through the crowds, in a respectful manner. Someone exiting the venue neglects those two beautiful words, “excuse me,” and instead reaches out and grabs your waist in order to move your body out of their way. 

Whether this action was intended as a kind gesture to let you know that they are squeezing through, or because they thought they were entitled to be present in that very place more than you did, or whether they thought you looked hot in your glitter clad outfit, you’ve been touched by that person in a mildly sexual manner, and it’s been done without your consent. 

Getting a little handsy at Java might not seem like a huge deal, but often for women or femme presenting folks, this behavior is common, and it is frustrating. So, I asked a couple friends about their experiences at Java. 

“I’ve had the experience of someone being blackout and trying to grab me. We had to create a human wall, and when that wall was removed, I was grabbed by that person who then tried to kiss me.” 

“Someone slapped my ass.” 

“Someone grabbed my ponytail and yanked it twice before saying excuse me.” 

Ever seen one of those dope Java Beans in those fluorescent yellow shirts that reads “TIPS?” That stands for “Training for Intervention Procedures,” and those folks living in Java are trained for this. So, should you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation, grab a Java Bean and they will help you out. 

Forms of non-consensual touching are far from infrequent, or unnoticed, and it’s found all over the world, both on and off college campuses. An an ad campaign by Ogilvy Sao Paulo, conducted during the fall of 2018 in Brazil, addressed this issue of non-consensual touching. The project involved the development of a touch-sensitive dress that registers how many times the women wearing it were touched throughout an evening spent at a nightclub. Three women wore the Smart Dress for just under four hours: they were touched 147 times. 

So, this Friday, October 4th, 2019, when you’re tearing it up on the street outside the Ticker, or within those iconic, grimy wooden walls, remember this article. 

When you’ve gotta move through that mob of fellow SLUzers, think! Before you place your hand on that person’s butt, squeeze their waist, or rub their shoulders, give those words “excuse me” a shot. 

And if you find some cutie that you want to touch, dance with, smooch, or boink, try talking to them first, and make sure you ask for CONSENT. 

Stay wet, stay hot, and stay consensual.