Practice Makes Perfect
*The names in this story have been changed to retain student anonymity and privacy.
“I feel like for some people, it’s not good because…” Kenna begins.
“They get hurt,” Chloe cuts her off. She is familiar with the emotional turmoil that goes hand-in-hand with hookup culture.
“Some people get attached to that person when usually the two people want different things,” continues Kenna. “They never both agree.”
“Someone always gets attached,” Chloe concurs.
“It’s usually the girl,” Kenna says. “And then the boy just wants to hook up and maybe get with other people, and the girl gets hurt because she doesn’t want him to. It just creates a whole mess.”
“But hookup culture can also be good after a relationship,” Chloe admits, aware of the benefits of low-commitment romances while one is recovering from heartbreak.
“It might be fun to mix it up sometimes, get some new people,” Kenna agrees.
“That’s true. Got to find out what you like,” giggles Chloe. “Experiment, experiment!”
“Practice makes perfect,” Kenna affirms, paving new meaning for the age-old cliché. “So you practice in your hookups for the real man.”
“Practice for the game,” Chloe adds, throwing her hands up to make an “it-is-what-it-is” gesture.
Hookup culture is widespread among college students. According to research conducted by a University of North Carolina team, 72 percent of college students report hooking up by their senior year. Additionally, a study by Dr. Paula England, a professor of sociology at New York University, found that college seniors have hooked up with an average of eight people over their four years.
Several boys congregate in a neighboring room. A familiar aura of Friday night overwhelms the senses. A dirty rug reeks of Busch Light and Kunoco pizza. The lights are off, and decorations are sparse. They mute the TV and begin talking about hooking up, something they have all partaken in at least once already this year.
“Hooking up is getting with people that you don’t necessarily know very well,” Will says, outlining the general premise of the phenomena.
“Or getting with someone one night, and then not even saying hi to them the next day,” Jack adds, likely reflecting upon his own experience of connections that are formed during one-night stands.
“I enjoy hookup culture,” Connor admits while shrugging his shoulders. “It’s fun to meet new people and get around.”
“Almost all the time, it involves alcohol,” Will adds, solidifying his claim by recalling fragmented memories of the countless times he has drunkenly staggered into the dorm with a stranger he met that same night.
“Alcohol is either the cause or a big factor to it,” Jack seconds.
Like these boys, many college students find themselves more likely to hook up if they are drunk. Research conducted by the Iowa State University team found that nearly 80 percent of students said there was alcohol involved before or during a hookup they had on campus.
Returning to the heavily decorated, cleaner room next door, the girls have transitioned to discussing the differences between hooking up and dating. They agree that relationships are possible at SLU but admit first-year students tend to opt for hooking up.
“You kind of hoe out freshman year,” Chloe says. “Then you realize how small this campus is and how your options are very limited, so then you circle back and form connections.”
“I think everyone is also adulting, so they will pick a point where they want to settle down,” Sadie elaborates upon the shift from hooking up to dating.
“Yeah, I think it gets tiring,” Kenna reflects on her own treacherous experience of romance without a label.
“I honestly think it sometimes hurts more than a real relationship,” Chloe admits.
“I agree because you don’t actually know what you are,” Kenna says.
“It’s like a mock relationship without the title,” Chloe chips in. “And then it ends, and it’s literally the same thing.”
“You just think about the potential of what it could be, and that’s what hurts the most,” sighs Sadie. “Whereas if you had a relationship and it didn’t work out, then you both know you tried.”
“You have a clear like we were dating and we broke up,” Chloe continues.
“Yeah,” affirms Kenna. “And if it’s a situationship, it kind of just–”
“Splits,” Sadie finishes. “And usually, it splits fast.”
Luckily, hookup culture does not normally replace serious relationships. According to research published in The Gendered Society Reader, 71 percent of college students report having been in a committed relationship that lasted over six months by their senior year. Despite the hopes of eventually shifting to dating, hookup culture still dominates the romantic scene at SLU, especially for first-year students.
Certain spots on or near campus are famous for hooking up. One of the most popular is the Ticker. While most grab that night’s lover and trek back to campus, some opt for more convenient locations, like the dance floor.
“I think hooking up in the Ticker sucks,” Will exclaims, turning to the other guys to hear their thoughts on the matter.
“Hooking up in public is rude,” Connor says, recalling his disgust at witnessing PDA on the Ticker dance floor.
“I’ve actually never hooked up in the Ticker,” Will professes chivalrously, revealing a subtle superiority complex for not succumbing to the dishonorable manifestation of carnal desires that occur in the Ticker.
“Uhhhh,” Jack chuckles while looking guiltily around the room.
“He knows a thing or two because he’s seen a thing or two!” laughs Joe, tilting his head in Jack’s direction while whistling the Farmers Insurance jingle to hint at his friend’s weak spot.
“I accidentally kissed Katie in the Ticker,” Connor confesses, contradicting his earlier statement about Ticker hookups being rude.
“Accidentally?” Will questions with a subtle smirk.
“Been there, done that,” mutters Jack, still regretting the times he hooked up with the same girl as Connor.
“It’s a weird experience,” Joe begins, imagining the chaotic Ticker scene in his head. “You’re in a sweaty room with 40 other kids, and you want to make out in the middle of the room?”
“Or on the elevated surface,” laughs Will.
“Ah, the elevated surfaces!” Jack reminisces, excited at the mention of the iconic wooden tables at the Ticker.
“That’s outrageous,” Joe grimaces, horrified at the thought of witnessing a hookup atop the unsteady platforms.
Back with the girls, the conversation has shifted to why guys seem reluctant to get into a relationship. Overly loud music is muffled by the walls, separating them from a raging party in a neighboring room of boys.
“I feel like there’s a stigma among the culture of the guys of who can get with as many girls,” Sadie says.
“It seems cringy for them to actually like a girl,” Chloe nods.
“And they don’t talk about their emotions,” Chloe adds, clearly frustrated by the lack of maturity of the guys in these helpless love affairs. “They just try to use us.”
“Like toys,” Kenna adds while the girls erupt in laughter.
“We are toys!” Maddy giggles with a twinge of sadness as she thinks about the daily objectification she feels from men.
Sadly, Maddy is not alone. According to research published in Psychology of Women by Barbara Frederickson and Tomi-Ann Roberts, objectification is when “women are treated as bodies–and in particular, as bodies that exist for the use and pleasure of others.” College women are human beings with thoughts, ambitions, feelings, and so much more. Why are men allowed to dehumanize them to just another body on a list of female conquests?