By ANNA SODERBERG

St. Lawrence University’s admissions office has been hard at work this month making their final decisions for the upcoming class of SLU students. Rumor has it that the class of 2021 is sure to be the most uniquely diverse class yet. However, students may be in need of assistance when opening their fate-filled envelopes due to the fact that most don’t have opposable thumbs. Confused? That is correct, SLU is only accepting the finest felines and smartest snakes, along with many other creative critters. Taking this fresher approach to the admissions system this year will not only bring a popular buzz to campus, but will also create conversation amongst students and faculty regarding class expectations and alterations for students. Drew Houx ’18, an Admission Ambassador here at St. Lawrence stated, “The industry is changing. and SLU needs to be on the forefront of this animal-friendly movement.”

The significant switch from humans to animals will guarantee controversial responses; however, that is not the only worry that comes along with the progressive change. On-campus housing and dormitories will need major adjustments in order to appropriately accommodate each animal that plans on attending SLU. The St. Lawrence maintenance crew is sure to have their work cut out for them with expanding doorways and adjusting bathroom facilities, but that doesn’t stand close to the research Dana Dining Services will be expected to do in order to feed the mouths of each student species present on campus. The dining services are sure to have various new and interesting dishes being served this fall of 2017.

Teaching animals will require St. Lawrence’s first-year program curriculum to have specific, qualified teachers who are able to communicate with the different animal species in order to be confident they are understanding the material and staying engaged throughout their classes. Whether this will bring teacher layoffs has yet to be determined; however, we are hopeful that a majority of SLU’s teachers are already fluent in different variations of animal so they can remain teaching here on campus.

Sports teams will be extremely affected by the incorporation of new species into the university. The men’s hockey team, however, is already looking forward to the admittance of Roger McIce, a polar bear who hails from Sitka, Alaska. “We believe that Roger’s presence in Appleton Arena will effectively intimidate Clarkson during next year’s season,” said Victor McNair, who serves as St. Lawrence’s new recruiting director for animal athletics.

Whether or not SLU Admissions made the right decisions is up for SLU individuals to decide. Either way, campus this coming fall is sure to experience a change in the dynamic of all aspects of student life and learning. Just make sure to watch where you step, and most importantly, don’t forget to ask before petting a fellow student.