It might seem like forever ago, but I think we all remember (whether we want to admit it or not) the COVID days of TikTok. With everyone stuck inside, TikTok exploded, and soon Gen Z TikTokers would become household names. Addison Rae, Lil Huddy, and Dixie D’Amelio all topped the charts in terms of followers and celebrity TikTok status.

Of course, they were all surpassed by the now legendary Charlie D’Amelio, who accrued 50 million followers in April of 2020. And just a few months later in November, she would become the first person to hit 100 million followers on TikTok.

But like all things on TikTok, no matter how popular Charlie or her friends got, they were all doomed to eventual irrelevancy, as the endless machine of content continued to pump out new creators and new trends.

But even in the psychological meatgrinder of TikTok, people are still looking for connection and relatability. Part of what made Charlie so famous was her relatability as a young girl, showing off her quirky personality and her authentic self—something many young girls (the majority of TikTok users) envy.

But much like Yugoslavia after the death of Tito, once Charlie departed from the spotlight, that niche became divided by various competing creators and micro-subgroups. Sorority house rushing tutorials battled with post-ironic, fake, goth e-girls for dominance, just as the Serbs had battled against those damned Croats in the hills surrounding Vukovar all those years ago.

But alas, as all sides appear battle-worn and weary, a new creator has emerged out of seemingly nowhere, and taken the spotlight for herself, without even trying. I am, of course, talking about Alix Earle.

Regardless of what complicated and totally not malicious algorithm the Chinese use to determine who gets put in your 16-year-old’s TikTok feed, Earle has blown up on the platform, racking up five million followers. 1.7 million of those being gained in just a month.

Earle’s content is what makes her so attractive to young girls. Being a 22-year-old senior at the University of Miami, she posts about her ‘sorority girl’ lifestyle of nights out partying and living it up in Miami, all while dealing with the stress and insanity that comes with college.

Her ‘Get Ready With Me’ series has become super popular across the app. Consisting of her makeup routines before nights out on the town, her videos have become infamous for wiping out whole sections at makeup stores when she reveals a new product she is using. Her openness about her struggle against acne, and her messy (to put it nicely) apartment, have also helped her become more relatable to her audience.

The rise of Alix Earle shows no signs of stopping, and girl, I’m here for- wait, wait, wait, no, no, stop I can- I can’t finish this (dramatically takes off recording headphones and begins to speak to the audience directly). Is this really the girl that deserves our attention? And I’m speaking to all the girls out there on this one, should it really be her?

I mean, I get she has some good messages with her acne stuff and showing she’s not perfect, but overall, is she really someone to aspire to? To me, she just seems like a glorified sorority chick. And trust me, those girls might seem like they have this super fun girboss life, but in reality, there’s not enough Titos and boxed wine in the world that will fix their problems.

But hey, that’s just my two cents, so feel free to call me a sexist. The ball is in your court. Make sure to vote in the next presidential election, thank you for tuning in, and goodnight.